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Season 28 Episode 2: Hairy He-Men 5



The title for Biggest and Hairiest Beast around is undisputedly owned by MDW’s latest freak acquisition, Zack Altovito. Damien Rush is non-too pleased to be usurped in this regard, confronting Zack in the middle of the ring, looking to assert himself to the ends of Zack admitting defeat and naming Rush the superior man. 


Damien eyes Zack’s bulging biceps and shelf-like chest, all coated by a thick tuft of manliness. Seemingly undaunted by Zack’s package, or perhaps even emboldened by it, Rush issues a challenge to Altovito while running his fingers through his own hairy pecs and hitting a few poses. Calmly, Zack accepts, sizing himself up to be the stronger hairy He-Man. Altovito barely breaks a sweat, arm-wrestling his way to a quick victory over Rush. But in spite of his massive size advantage, Zack may prove to be too nice a guy to best Damien in a wrestling match. After all, Rush has carved out a respectable trail of competitive matches to his credit and has proven on multiple occasions that he is a crafty ring veteran.


Success runs dry for Zack, when he is low-blown and stomped halfway to hell by the opportunistic Rush, who hastily announces, “Wrestling match start!” The huge hairy mass of hunk, agonizes beneath Damien, who is ruthlessly pummeling Zack, to deepen the effects of his groin strike. Rush knows the best way to chop down a big tree is starting at the legs, which in the case of Altovito, prove to be very much like tree trunks. “I’m gonna crush these legs you’re so proud of, I’m gonna break them!” Where Damien is involved, there will never be a lack of alpha male ego ready to make or break its wielder. Rush is ever a trash talker, finding true satisfaction when he can make his opponent hear how much better he is than them and wastes no time spewing a mixture of taunts and insults, amidst claims of his superiority. 


Through shadowy vines of alpha hair, Damien’s muscles contract, as he delivers liver punches to a doubled over Zack, who is stupefied by the measure of relentlessness in Rush’s onslaught. Without neglecting any of Zack’s hairy physique for tormenting and punishment, Damien maintains a clear focus on Zack’s massive lower body, declaring, “I’m gonna break that hamstring,” while hammering fists into Zack’s beautiful bottom. 


Rush obliges himself, snaking his thick arm under Zack’s chin and around his neck, demanding “What do you think of those muscles now? I think you need a closer look.” Zack is a heap of defeat admitting that he is out of his league against Damien, who is still so incensed at the rugged Altovito, that he ignores Zack’s pleas of “No more!” Continuing to beat Zack senseless, until the leaner of the hairy He-Men is satisfied with the muscle-man’s destruction.

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